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Please forgive me, I was angry at the World.
Views: 255 · Added: 711 days ago

Sunday May 27, was the day my father died. A day that started like any other but went on and on and never seemed to want to end. It was the longest and yet the shortest day of my life. And as the terror of it passed to memory so the hate grew and took it's place. Hate of those who came to the house to speak of his death, hate of those who may have been partly responsible, hate of those who saw him last, hate of everything. And most frightening of all was my hatred of him for leaving me. When I went to see him as he lay at rest in his coffin the look on his face made me smile. It was a look I was very familiar with and looking back it was an expression I am glad was his last. It was the look he gave when he was pissed off. I think it was a very fitting last look. One that I am happy to remember, because it's brought closure in a strange way. It's as if he knows he's dead and it pisses him off.

There are some things that Thomas and others have said to me lately that have brought me out of the shadows. They have managed to get through to me where my family and friends never quite could. The internet is a great tool and can be used for a multitude of things. In my case it has been a good counseling tool. I sought to escape from reallity into this virtual world where actions have no consequence and where it can end at the press of a button. Like the holodeck on the Enterprise, "computer, end programme". But actions have consequences and there is no place for rudeness nor unfriendly behaviour. So I offer my appologies to all those people I have rejected as friends. It was a very selfish attitude and a very immature attitude. There is a definate advantage to having virtual friends. It was my friends here in GBT that drew me out from the dark. It never really dawned on me that there was something wrong with my attitude to people in the real world untill I realised I was doing wrong here in cyberspace. My ginger friend said I had become more aggresive and distant, others mentioned the same. But I was oblivious till now. It was the message on my wall from thomas that knocked some sense into me.

Writing this blog has has certainly been good and has cleared my head and I can feel a weight lifted from me. I could easliy ramble on and on but I feel now that I have said I've been mistaken about the virtues of virtual friendships I feel better. The next thing I need to do is to drink less. My alcohol consumption has gone over the top. I have consumed nearly all of my fathers whisky. My motherr does not know how much he had. But I'm only 18 and my liver can recover...lol.

So, in closing this meassge/blog, I will stop rejecting friendship requests and thank Thomas et al for saving me from my demons.

I WANT TO MOVE TO NEW YORK STATE......
Views: 181 · Added: 321 days ago

Ok family I need your help!

share
Views: 137 · Added: 376 days ago

like to share my love with all my friends, and those that are going or have been through a rough time, its all about sharing, so BIG hugs and kisses from me to all of you where ever you are in the world

whats your fetish?
Views: 434 · Added: 408 days ago

whats your fetish? just comment whats one of your fetishes, two of mine are bondage and old/younger

Emotional Sexual Fantasies
Views: 238 · Added: 268 days ago

Ever have sexual fantasies that involve just a little bit of emotion? Let me tell you about the one that I came up with a couple of days ago.


This one involves my imaginary boyfriend, of course. I like to imagine that he is in the hospital for whatever reason (having his appendix removed maybe). One day, I casually go strolling into his hospital room after ending my shift at work and find him laying on his bed watching T.V. with his roomate (who just happens to also be young and attractive).


My boyfriend looks over and gives me a big smile when he notices me walking towards him (his bed is closest to the door with the other guy's bed on the opposite side).


I stroll over to the curtain that is hanging between the two beds and notice the roomate watching me as I slowly pull the curtain around my boyfriends bed. While I'm doing this, I'm looking at the roomate with a look on my face that says "mind your business".


I turn around and see my boyfriend staring at me with a loving grin on his face. That grin that he only gives to me and no one else. Before I sit on the side of his bed, I quietly pull his blanket down and notice that he's got a bit of a bulge going on underneath his gown.


As I'm sitting there on his bed, I'm chatting with him about how he's doing and tell him about how much I'm missing him. Once I have his full attention, I place my hand under his robe and on his knee. I slowly begin to slide my hand sensually up the inside of his thigh and onto his raging pole.


We keep speaking to each other as I'm sitting there slowly and sensually stroking him. After a bit, I tell him that I need to see his scar, so I reach down and gently pull his gown up, exposing his scar and boner. I keep stroking him as I gently trace his scar with the tip of my finger. I give him a warm smile and tell him that I'm sorry he's in the hospital. He just smiles back and tell's me that these things happen.


After a few seconds of silence, I bend down and begin licking his dick while I look him in the eye. He smiles back and gives me a look that says "please go all the way". I close my eyes and gently place him in my mouth while he tilts his head back and struggles not to make any noise.


As I'm slowly sucking on him, I open my eyes a bit and notice that his roomate is covertly watching us from around the curtain. I'm slightly angry about his sudden voyeurism but I don't say anything because I don't want to frighten my boyfriend.


I re-close my eyes and know that my boyfriend is getting close by his sudden thrusting in and out of my mouth. I pull my mouth off of him and begin stroking him again as I watch him shoot a load of jizz onto his face. I knew that my boyfriend hasn't gotten off in a long time. We are fiercely loyal to each other and would never pleasure ourselves without the other being right next to us.


After I clean him off with a cloth that I snuck into the hospital, I bend down and kiss him and notice a tear roll off his eye and down the side of his face. I know that my boyfriend misses me and is eager to come home and be with me again, and he knows that I am hurting and equally as eager to once again have him by my side.


I stand up and slowly pull the curtain back from around the bed and notice the roomate watching me again. I tilt my head down sligtly, raise my right eyebrow and give him a look that says "don't you say a damn thing to my boyfriend about this!".


I turn and smile at my boyfriend and tell him that I will be back later, being sure to say it loud enough that his roomate will hear me. I walk out into the hallway far enough that my boyfriend can't see me. I turn and glare at his roomate one last time before walking away...


So what are some of your emotional fantasies? Tell me about that special fantasy that you've conjured up in the past that means more to you than the other ones.

Am I the One I've been waiting for???
Views: 221 · Added: 571 days ago

I have been pretty busy of late, busy doing things that i will remember for the rest of my life.
This last year everything has been coming to a point of change in my life. It started when i came here first .. and later came out, after confronting my past and the problems that come with that and trying to manage the PTSD that followed, I have started along a new path. I will no longer hide from my past and avoid it, i am not afraid to go forward and be who i am now.
For a long time I have been waiting for something to happen, and opportunity maybe or another direction. Recently I heard that a couple of people I was close to in another country have since died and only young too.. i know life is too short, but its also what we do with the time that matters.
I know that fortune favours the brave, and i have to make my chances by going out there and being proactive. I am the one I was waitng for it seems, I am the one who will make that opportunity, and see the new path to take.
I have been to two interviews this week to be able to do something that many tens of thousands of people will see and enjoy and was succesful in both, i have another next week and am also now one of the finalists in a prestigious art competition, I started my counceling and i am doing new classes and meeting new people too.
The point is, i went out and gave it a go, even though i am so shy and feeling so bad about myself most of the time, and i stopped waiting for the change to come to me and just started doing something... and stopped waiting for me.

Maybe you are the one you've been waiting for?
maybe you are the one the world is waiting for!

Devine pointers?
Views: 272 · Added: 895 days ago

Last week,a friend of mine saw a likeness of Mother Teresa in,a chocolate covered
biscuit. In our house various icons have turned up in everything from rice puddings to a bar of soap.
Only last week my sister saw our dear departed dog in a loaf of bread.

As I was serving up the Sunday roast I was astonished to see an uncanny resemblance to myself in a Yorkshire Pudding.

I would welcome comments to this almost religious experience.

Respond
Views: 167 · Added: 341 days ago

We still dont get how this respond button works.

anyone 18 or under in southern ontario?
Views: 863 · Added: 885 days ago

just turned 18...seeing if theres anyone on here from southern ontario

Please Don't Feed the Animals
Views: 232 · Added: 683 days ago

I offer this just as a thought. When confronted with a thing that feeds on raw emotion...do not feed it...ignore it and let it die. To feed it back only encourages it to continue to spew venom. It cannot survive being ignored...it withers away like a turd in the rain.

Holy Crap! Its the end!
Views: 235 · Added: 710 days ago

You know guys, Missouri is a beautiful state but we also live in a violent state. Two days ago in a matter of minutes a storm with 60 mile an hour winds and I swear the lightning of Zeus himself blew through here. A tree next to my place took a firect hit and the bolt ground out in my well. Burnt out the pump motor. The wind took the roof off my wood working building, ( I am a woodcarver by trade) I thought my number was up. So if I am not around for a while dont think I ran away or died or forgot ya. I am just putting the pieces back together. This old buzzard aint going nowhere. Ya'll are stuck with me

Whole Albums Avatar boy
Views: 383 · Added: 50 days ago

Dear Everybody:

I'm new here, as a member, been coming here for years totally love this site.. I've noticed by the Avatars of some members, their into young like me..

hey all
Views: 215 · Added: 712 days ago

how is everyone???

CUTETWINKI
Views: 281 · Added: 626 days ago

Damien has left us..without saying GOODBYE..anybody any idea's why..i have his e-mail address but no reply as yet!
Russ.

Butt plug in while fucking
Views: 251 · Added: 508 days ago

When I fuck a boy or a girl, I prefer to keep my butt plug in. Anyone else experiences with that.

WHERE ARE YOU
Views: 180 · Added: 650 days ago

IS THERE ANYBODY IN THE SO CAL AREA

new digs lol
Views: 130 · Added: 36 days ago


let's be friend
Views: 185 · Added: 305 days ago

looking for friends... I'm 20 and looking for chat friends. kik freshindo


thx guys

Hi guys, I really love this community here at gayboystube.com. You guys have really built something to be proud of. I'm hoping to start a discussion here, concerning this communities experiences and attitudes with the whole subject of showering practices at school, college, military, health clubs or some other arrangement, that you can enlighten us with. This discussion is open to all members, young and older. We can all learn from one another. Showering practices, attitudes or beliefs about it, have certainly changed over time and continue to evolve. I thought this would be an interesting topic for discussion, because of the diverse membership, with worldwide reach. Blessings to all.

I have a major thing for Asian boys...
Views: 215 · Added: 102 days ago

A few days ago, via Grindr, I found a guy who lives 5 mins from me and is after a ''cuddle buddy, friend with some benefits'' so I said hi and last nite he came over, we had cuddles, and within seconds of getting into bed his dick rubbed on my tummy and seconds later the clothes were off and we were at it. He is Malaysian background and has an amazing body and is so so cute and tonite I'm going to his place. He said we should do this ''most nites'' so I said look I could probably manage that haha.


I have such a thing for Asian boys. Not really vietnamese but all other asian boys just get me so hard. My last bf was from Hong Kong, and I've slept with one from every asian continent. (Not India, which is often refered to as South Asian, I just could never go there)


I remember 10 years ago, I was never attracted to them. Then I had a cute Thai boy one night, and it opened my eyes, but then I didn't experience another one until 2007 when I started a relationship with a guy who's parents are from Philipines but he was born here. We had an off and on again totally demented relationship that continues to this day, and we made a deal to one day get married.


But in the meantime, especially in the last 3 years, I just can't get enough of Asian guys. White guys lose their appeal to me once they hit about 21, I just don't like the ''manly'' look. I prefer slim, smaller built teenage-type bodies and us white guys just tend to lose them in the early 20's. I haven't lost mine (probably why I still get to sleep with ... younger guys) and I'm 33 now. But Asian boys keep these bodies until they are like 30! Its AMAZING and I love their smooth skin and cute looks and the way they always seem to be able to blow a HUGE load, which is good because I am quite the cum slut.


Too Much Reposts
Views: 873 · Added: 1328 days ago

Seems to be a lot of stuff being posted that has been posted before. Would be nice to see new stuff not old stuff.

Views: 599 · Added: 863 days ago

c2c ? i'm 17 let me yours skype username

Kyler Moss
Views: 374 · Added: 650 days ago

Anyone knows where I can download the sugar daddy videos of Kyler? I's also really love to find "raw 2" the kinky video he did together with Roxy Red :$ thnx xxx

Greetings
Views: 214 · Added: 165 days ago

Just wanted to say hey - been a lurker and watcher for a long time now and finally decided to not keep losing some good videos, so I'm here to watch and lurk and favorite at the same time haha.

new vids
Views: 2342 · Added: 1055 days ago

Hi guys. I want to post more vids, but they maybe borderlne. x

How often do you bottom? 100% 50% 0%? Just curious.
Views: 289 · Added: 681 days ago

I personally bottom about 30% of the time, I really enjoy bottoming but prefer to top.
What are everyone else's percentages?

Bisexual
Views: 381 · Added: 182 days ago


Big Cock or Small Cock or Normal Cock
Views: 982 · Added: 1092 days ago

Whats better?? Big Cock or Small Cock or Normal Cock??? And Why??

"BillyB" (or as we call him "Billy3") remains in the hospital at this time, following what we now know is an attempt to end his own life.

We are here to find more of his online friends as we are at other places we know he visits. We don't know all of you, but hope you will join us this evening for a candlelight vigil for him. Please join the support page we have set up for him here at http://www.gayboystube.com/user/friendsofbilly

From there, you can access the external blog where we are posting updates to family and friends near and far. You are welcome to join there and can create a Google account to do so with your current email address.

At 9:00 p.m. we invite you to light a candle and watch/listen/sing to one of his favorite videos, a concert he wanted to go to this year but cancelled due to the Olympics in London.

Thank you for keeping Billy in your thoughts and if a person of faith, your prayers also. We thank God he is still here. Now, we intend to bring him back, all the way and hopefully more.

Chris Savas, Billy's uncle

wtf
Views: 97 · Added: 10 days ago


hmm was asked to place this in the garden its not realy a beautiful work of art - a bit disturbing wonder what you think ?


bad
Views: 141 · Added: 339 days ago

I feel like such a piece of crap right now, like for realz

hi
Views: 176 · Added: 375 days ago

Sorry I havent responded to anyone. I was back in the hospital. I had an infection on my stump and the doctors ended up wacking off another 3 inches of what used to be my leg. They said if they didnt I would have died of blood poisioning. I should have not told them about it. Feels like they are taking me an inch at a time

First
Views: 694 · Added: 352 days ago

Do you recall your first memory of cumming? were you alone? with someone? where were you?

Down To The Stragglers...
Views: 181 · Added: 337 days ago

We are down to a mere 6 people who were born in the 19th century.




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